About the Book
Talk with Death: A Practical Guide to Mortality Partnership
In January 2022, six months after being diagnosed with an aggressive brain tumour, I had my first conversation with Death.
Not a metaphorical conversation. Not a meditation. An actual dialogue, where Death spoke back.
His first words were: "Calm down or you won't be able to understand me."
Then: "My first suggestion is you stop performing for everyone."
That conversation—and the practice that emerged from it—changed everything that followed. Not my prognosis. Not my treatment. But my relationship with mortality itself.
This book teaches that practice.
What's in the Book
This isn't inspirational content about "embracing death" or "finding meaning in suffering." It's a practical methodology for establishing Death as an advisor—a felt presence you can actually speak with.
The book covers:
- Why traditional approaches fail — Positive thinking, gratitude practices, and "staying strong" don't address Death directly
- The discharge process — How to clear rage, fear, and grief so Death can actually speak
- Establishing the relationship — Practical steps for initiating dialogue with Death
- Values vs. performance — How Death reveals what you're performing versus what actually matters
- Daily practice — Maintaining ongoing dialogue as life circumstances change
- Case studies — Examples from real practitioners across different situations
Who It's For
This book is for anyone facing mortality—which is everyone, eventually. But it's particularly relevant for:
- People with serious diagnoses who are exhausted by inspirational advice
- Caregivers watching someone they love die
- Bereaved people who've done grief work but haven't engaged Death itself
- Professionals who work with death (hospice, palliative care, therapy)
- Anyone with death anxiety interfering with their life
About the Author
I'm Benjamin Dives. Father of five (plus three stepchildren). British, currently based in Sheffield. Studying a Masters in clinical Psycho-Neuro-Immunology.
In 2021, I was diagnosed with an aggressive brain tumour after the kind of headache that felt like being burnt from inside my skull. Surgery, radiation, chemotherapy followed. The prognosis was uncertain.
What I found was that every piece of advice I received was useless. Stay positive. Fight. Be grateful. None of it addressed the actual terror of facing my own death.
So I developed my own approach, drawing on practices I'd learned years earlier but never applied to mortality. That approach became this methodology. That methodology became this book.
I now teach this work to others through intensive programs. This book is the first step in making the methodology accessible to anyone who needs it.